Heya

Not much to say tonight as the snow continues blowing past my window. Its Friday night, C's already in bed and here I am tapping away at the keyboard. Feeling very self-conscious about my writing at the moment - I spent some time just perusing other people's blogs and I must say, there's a heck of a lot of writing talent flying around out there. Plus, I've felt trapped a little in my writing recently because of who I am and the people who read my blog. I don't know, maybe I'm just being paranoid, but some of you bloggers really go all-out with your personal stories and what-goes-on-in-my-mind episodes. Myself, I increasingly find myself unwilling to blurt about the sordid workings of my mind or the less exciting aspects of being me. To some part, maybe I'm just not the exhibionist I thought I was, but also I'm worried what some of you readers might think of me.

(this image courtesy of www.psychology-concordia.ca)

For example, I gave my blog address to some dear friends down in Cornwall a while ago when I posted pictures and a story about a visit with them. Now, these are lovely people and I doubt they come "here" regularly. And in turn, I'm not sure I'm comfortable telling you all about my secret glue-sniffing addiction or my favourite swearwords if I imagine that my light-hearted (okay, if I really sniffed glue, that should be "light-headed") and, err, intimate scribblings should happen before them. They don't know me that way, and I don't know if I want this to change. Do you understand what I'm saying? Maybe some of you have come across the situation before and know what I mean? I know that Kaat of the Totally Biased Book and Movie Review, for example, has made one of her blogs private for that very same reason. The slightly schizophrenic part of my quandary is that I wouldn't actually mind telling an audience of complete strangers or blogger friends who know only my "online personality"(whatever that is) all about my horrible habits and hilariously hallucinogenous high-jinks. With people who know me for certain things I do or stand for, however, I'm not so sure. I mean, what will one of my former clients think if they surf hither and find me slagging off life as a trainer or ranting about the absurd situations my previous occupation has put me through? And that is an example I'm not half as worried about as I'd be about some other people reading my personal splurges...

(this image courtesy of www.pawprince.com)

Anyway, at least I've managed to be honest and adress this issue with you here - it has been bugging me and impeding my blogging output greatly in recent weeks. So, there, I've told you - not sure where to go from here, but at least the crazy, worry-worthy part of me that thinks this blog is a conversation with you not a one-way thing is happier now I've come out and been honest. Well, and now that that's done, I think I'll retire for a little more mooching and poring over other people's scribbles... Be safe, y'all!